I’m spending my Friday night in bed. I love when I get to relax and have no commitments to anyone or anything haha. I decided that I’d Google my horoscope because I haven’t in forever and oddly enough it is totally relatable. This is what I read…
Ruts be damned — you’re going to break that rusty cage this year, Taurus! 2015 is all about releasing the dross from your life so that you can embrace some glorious new horizons. Letting go is your least favorite endeavor, and yet you’ve nearly achieved mastery. You’ve been there and done that when it comes to enduring the pain that ensues from clinging too tightly. You’re learning to appreciate what you have in the moment, count your blessings and stay present in the gratitude of what is rather than what was or what could be. This is a year to make your existing structures stronger and expand on your fabulous vision. Magic is yours for the making in 2015!
This is also a year for reconnecting to your roots of strength and creativity in preparation for a steamy little romantic cycle that kicks off this August. Pleasure and love are yours in great abundance from late summer until well into 2016, so savor every second! This good fortune in your love department comes but once every 12 years, so you don’t want to miss it by remaining stuck in your loyal zone of duty and responsibility. Give yourself permission to break free for those late summer months to truly indulge in the goodness that life insists on delivering in a major way.
I know people usually try to relate to their horoscopes but I actually can’t begin to express how much this freaked me out. I actually had a conversation with someone earlier today about how I had to detach myself from them. This isn’t because he is anything short of great as a person and has been to me but because I really confided in this person way too much and it got to a point where I could feel that it got weird. I kind of got an ultimatum today and because I have openly admitted to maybe having commitment issues, I obviously chose to let it go rather than to do what was needed in order to keep what was there. I had to explain why I became the way I am now.
Here’s some of the conversation of me trying to explain it all. There’s more to it but it’s overly strange sharing all of it haha
I went on to say that I’m really glad that I did because I wasn’t being my complete self. I never saw myself in that state because I was actually in denial over it haha but now being on the outside of that mentality, I feel so much better. It was so difficult for me to ever have imagined letting go of those emotions but I actually did it and I couldn’t be happier. Holding on to things you want to be true are a complete waste of time. It’s always sad when you have to tell someone you care and they don’t believe you. I found myself caring and always having to defend that I did because I was accused of not caring. Anyway, I know I’m not some supermodel with the world to offer but I’m a damn good person and I am so genuine that anyone who questions it obviously doesn’t know me that well. It took a while for me to realize that too. I now see and actually feel that I can bring a lot of greatness to someone’s life when I’m just being me/not being on the defence all the time and I have to admit that it is one of the most liberating feelings in the world. It wasn’t that this person didn’t tell me all these great things about me, I just felt that I had to be more of the mold he wanted than be myself to be all of those great things and that’s absolutely no way to live. It’s actually kind of disturbing looking back at how much I tried to edit myself lol. The converstion was kind of left at a “I’ll see you around” but I know that what’s done is done. I never wrote it down on paper but part of my New Years resolution was to really try to find myself-the core of my being (as dramatic as it sounds) and so far this year I really have. I’m kind of excited to see what’s in store! Haha. Anyway, enough with the mushy mushy haha I’ll be back for my 30 day challenge tomorrow!